Oh Brother!

2.27.2011

I am channeling my inner Carrie Bradshaw with this post, although my life is not nearly as interesting and my insight into relationships is fairly limited considering I married my high school sweetheart! But considering relationship complications are surrounding me, it's on the brain, and hence, deserving a spot on the blog. 


Have you ever had someone close to you go through a break-up and you feel like you're in the middle of a break-up too? Maybe I'm the only one, but I will be the first to admit that I am going through post partum brother break-up syndrome, and it has been one crazy roller coaster. 


My brother, B, is 2 years older than me, and growing up we fought...a lot. As you can see in the picture below, I was probably crying because of something mean my brother did. Not that I was an angel either, though!  You could definitely tell that we were brother and sister, and I remember always being called "mini B" by teachers, etc.  




Once I got to middle school, I realized the advantages of having an older brother, or at least one that was a good athlete and pretty popular. I loved going to basketball games with my friends and getting to watch my brother play! Anyone who knows him knows that he has the most amazing 3-point shot! When he started getting interested in girls, that's when I officially was able to begin my role as sister...aka...I was always in his "business." I like being involved in his life because I care about him, want him to be happy, and maybeee a tiny part of me wants a sister-in-law/nieces and nephews...I'm just sayinnnnnn! 


B is a good looking guy and had a couple of girlfriends or flings in high school and college, but never found anything too serious. Just as my mom and I were thinking "when will B ever find someone"...boom...he meets a girl named Kelly over the summer while he was in grad school.  They got serious pretty quickly, and I remember meeting her over labor day weekend on a trip home to the beach with my 2 fav college friends! She was wonderful! Super friendly, super down-to-earth, and adorable. Best of all, though, was that she brought out a really sweet side in my brother that we had never seen much of before!  They dated for over a year (maybe even close to 2...it's all getting fuzzy) and seemed so happy together. I got super close to her and really thought she would be my sister-in-law one day. I even asked her to be a bridesmaid in my wedding. And that's when it all fell apart. She broke up with him the summer after I graduated college, and he was heartbroken. And so was my family. No one saw it coming at all.  It was so hard to see B go through that. And it was also hard to lose a friend myself. It was like we had lost a family member. Flashforward one-and-a-half years to this past November, and B and Kelly decide to give it another chance. B had had mini-relationships with a few girls, Kelly had been in one long relationship, but neither had ever really gotten over each other.  It finally felt like the stars were all in alignment for this to be it...for them to finally work out. And bam! Kelly had to move to Florida in January because that was the only place she could find a nursing job. But things weren't looking too bad at that point. B was considering moving to Florida, they seemed on track to working towards getting back into a relationship.  And then the other bombshell comes.  The saga is so long and intense to get into, but the outcome essentially is that now my brother is on the other side, breaking her heart. And, this side is hard to watch, too. It's hard to watch a person you love be hurt by another person you love. And it's hard to watch a person you love hurt another person you love. But at the end of the day, my brother is still my brother, and he is following his heart, and as his sister, I support him in all that he does...even if I did accidentally cry on the phone with his ex girlfriend...in my defense it had been a really long week AND I can cry at the drop of a hat! 



So, lessons learned from this 3 year long saga:   
1) I cannot think that every girl my brother dates is going to be "the one" for him, therefore I cannot start prematurely getting excited about having a sister or being in another wedding or having cousins for my unborn bambinos! The mature, rational Lu will wait until there is an engagement to start entertaining those thoughts!
2) God's plans for B and all of us are so much bigger and so much greater than we could ever imagine, even if it takes hitting some bumps in the road to get there!

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